The Bystander Intervention Model

The Bystander Intervention Model predicts that he is more likely to help others under certain conditions. As the diagram indicates, bystander first must notice the incident taking place. Obviously, if he doesn’t take note of the situation there is no reason to help. 
Bystander also need to evaluate the situation and determine whether it is an emergency—or at least one in which someone needs assistance. Again, if he does not interpret a situation as one in which someone needs assistance, then there is no need to provide help. 
Another decision Bystander make is whether he should assume responsibility for giving help. 
One repeated finding in research studies on helping is that a Bystander is less likely to help if there are other bystanders present. 
When other bystanders are present responsibility for helping is diffused. 
If a lone bystander is present he or she is more likely to assume responsibility.    

Factors that Influence Helping

Many factors influence his willingness to help, including the ambiguity of the situation, perceived cost, diffusion of responsi­bility, similarity, mood and gender, attributions of the causes of need, and social norms.

• Situational ambiguity. In ambiguous situations, (i.e., it is unclear that there is an emergency) he is much less likely to offer assistance than in situations involv­ing a clear-cut emergency.
  He is also less likely to help in unfamiliar environments than in familiar ones (e.g., when he is in strange cities rather than in his hometowns).
• Perceived cost. The likelihood of helping increases as the perceived cost to himself declines. He is more likely to lend his class notes to someone whom he believe will return them than to a person who doesn't appear trustworthy.
• Diffusion of responsibility. The presence of others may diffuse the sense of indi­vidual responsibility. It follows that if you suddenly felt faint and were about to pass out on the street, you would be more likely to receive help if there are only a few passers-by present than if the street is crowded with pedestrians. With fewer people present, it becomes more difficult to point to the "other guy" as the one responsible for taking action. If everyone believes the other guy will act, then no one acts.
• Similarity.
  He is more willing to help others whom he  perceive to be similar to himself - people who share a common background and beliefs. He is even more likely to help others who dress like he does than those in different attire. He also tend to be more willing to help his kin than to help non—kin.
• Mood. He is generally more willing to help others when he is in a good mood.
• Gender.
  Despite changes in traditional gender roles, women in need are more likely than men in need to receive assistance from him.
  CMIIW (　＾∇＾)
• Attributions of the cause of need.
  He is much more likely to help others he judge to be innocent victims than those he believes have brought their prob­lems on themselves. Thus, he may fails to lend assistance to homeless people and drug addicts whom he feels "deserve what they get."
• Social norms.
  He will not touch you in public.

Sebenarnya, dia sangat malas menolong orang lain, karena menurutnya itu tidak berguna, tapi karena Allah, dia melakukannya juga. Hutangnya sangat banyak kepada Allah yang memeliharanya, jadi bagaimana dia bisa diam saja sementara ada makhluk Allah yang membutuhkannya, membutuhkan pertolongannya.
Memang, dia akui, setelah menolong (apapun jenis pertolongan/intervensinya), dia lebih baik bersikap "tidak terjadi apa-apa", karena....jagalah privacynya...dia tidak ingin semua orang minta bantuan kepadanya, dia juga ingin main, main mayat-mayatan di tempat tidur (gak gerak sama sekali), atau sekedar ingin menyendiri (dia merasa lebih nyaman saat dia berdialog dengan Tuhannya, Allah).

Hormatilah privacynya, karena sama sepertimu waktunya dalam sehari hanya 24 jam.

Dia menolongmu, cukup sampai disitu, kamu tidak perlu memberitahukannya kepada semua orang, atau memintanya untuk menunjukkan dirinya di depan orang lain, karena orang lain akan merasa iri "kenapa dia menolongmu, kenapa dia seperti itu kepadamu, sementara kepada kami, mendengarkan cerita kami pun dia ogah (tidak mau)?".
Pertanyaan yang akan sulit (karena enggan) untuk dijawabnya.

"Dia menolong siapa pun yang dia kehendaki dan
membiarkan siapa pun yang tidak dia kehendaki untuk ditolong".